Monthly Archives: March 2015
Now let us dance post by Tsering
Its Friday evening, the weekend has begun. Yay! I’m supposed to be happy but I’m not. I got out of the office at 7pm!!! (I’m supposed be off at 5!!!), and I still have so much work to do, It’s not even funny. And I was so not looking forward to working this weekend. I have put in extra hours at the office the past 2 weekends and it’s been crazy with the internet going crazy on us and making it harder to finish our work on time. One of my colleagues was just saying today that our apartments are starting to feel like hotels where we only go to sleep. I can only agree with her coz of our crazy schedule. I walk into my apartment at around 7.15, and I’m so tired I decide not to do my 20 mins workout (which I restarted recently, story for another time) and then I hear the speakers from next door blaring off. Then I remember a nurse I work with mention that it’s some hindu festival this month and its going to be like this for sometime. I’m frantic now trying to think of ways to block out the noise (music to the neighbors) and I spot my ipod and earphones and thank God for the tech people who created them. So, earphones in and loud music in my ears (probably noise to my neighbors), and I start dancing. And next thing I know I’m going crazy doing all the funny moves and my arms are flailing and legs kicking, if anyone saw me they would definitely put me in a straight jacket and put me in the isolation room in the psychiatric ward and wonder what amount of benzodiazepines would be needed to put me down after giving me the haloperidol. I kept dancing till I forgot about work and about working out and working on a Saturday and I actually had fun just going crazy in my room. I ended up dancing for over an hour and got the much needed work out I was trying to avoid. And yes, my mood also changed and I actually had fun. And I was thinking, if this goes on for the entire month, then wow! My dress is going to fit me and I won’t have to buy another one this summer!
While I was going doing my funny moves, I saw myself in the mirror and then I realized today’s lesson. I was not only dancing crazy, I also looked kind of crazy. And I remembered David. I remembered his story in 2 Samuel 6, when they were bringing back the ark of the Lord to Jerusalem and David was so happy and he was dancing and leaping and praising God, and his wife Michal saw him and thought he was crazy for doing that in public. And I began to think, am I like David dancing and leaping and praising God without caring about what the world says or no matter what kind of situation I’m in? or am I like Michal, worried about how I portray myself in public? This thought struck me so hard that I realized that I’m not strong enough to do things on my own. I need God’s presence in my life every second. I realized that I was working so hard without seeking the help that’s within my reach and letting myself burn out. All I had to do was stop everything for a minute or two and just surrender all to Him. Most days, we don’t realize but we do tend to think about what our colleagues/ supervisors or our family or friends or neighbors will say or think about us. For me, it was mostly, do they think I’m a workaholic, or a control freak or over ambitious or just putting on a show of working hard? Do they think I’m stuck up or unapproachable? And I wonder if these negative thoughts are not what is causing the burn out rather than the work I put in? I want to be like David, not worrying about what the world will say, because it’s between me and God in the end, not between me and the world. So now, I have decided that I’m going to work harder and be better but I’m not going to be burned out because I will be dancing and leaping and praising God no matter what situation I’m in. I know it’s easy to say something like this and very difficult to actually live it, but I remember reading somewhere that we should “pray the hardest, when it’s hardest to pray”. So, ladies (and gentlemen) bring out your dancing shoes, it’s time to dance them blues away as we learn to praise God and give Him glory in new ways and learn to listen to Him even on the noisiest of days.